How to Find the Right Therapist: A Guide For Autistic Adults

Finding the right therapist can be life-changing, especially for autistic adults, who often face unique challenges that many mental health professionals aren't fully equipped to understand. The therapeutic relationship is a deeply personal one. 

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For neurodivergent individuals, it's essential that the therapist not only has clinical expertise but also a respectful, affirming approach to autism itself. Too often, autistic adults encounter professionals who pathologize their experiences or prioritize masking over authentic self-expression, which can lead to harm rather than healing. 

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In this guide, we’ll explore how to find a therapist who truly sees and supports you on your terms, so that you can be partners on your journey toward better mental health.

The first step to finding the right therapist is identifying your unique needs and challenges. Here are some examples of potential therapy goals:

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• Finding care for co-occurring conditions, like anxiety or depression 
• Getting help with social skills and navigating social situations
• Coping with work stress
• Managing sensory sensitivities
• Regulating overwhelming emotions
• Learning personalized coping skills
• Improving communication skills
• General autism support 

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It might be helpful to try journaling about the things that make your life as an autistic person more challenging so that you can identify the things you’d most like to work on with the help of a therapist. 

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Then, try to decide which therapy style best resonates with you. Though there are countless therapy modalities out there, a few are thought to be especially helpful for autistic individuals. These modalities include:

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• Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): Cognitive behavioral therapy is a structured, goal-oriented approach that helps clients identify and reframe unhelpful thought patterns. For autistic adults, CBT is often adapted to be more inclusive and affirming. It targets issues such as anxiety, depression and stress by teaching coping strategies and problem-solving skills. Research shows that CBT can help autistic adults improve social skills and has been shown to help reduce feelings of anxiety and improve overall functioning. 
• Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT):  Dialectical behavior therapy is an offshoot of CBT that emphasizes both acceptance and change. DBT may be especially helpful for autistic adults who are struggling with depression, and early research shows that DBT can help significantly reduce suicidal ideation in autistic individuals. 
• Mindfulness-based therapies: Mindfulness-based practices, such as acceptance and commitment therapy, teach clients to focus on the present moment in a non-judgmental way. These interventions can be very effective in helping autistic adults manage anxiety and reduce stress by fostering improved self-regulation and awareness of internal experiences.

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On top of the therapy modality, you may want to make sure your therapist is neurodiversity-affirming and someone who has experience working with autistic adults. A neurodiversity-affirming therapist will understand and celebrate your unique perspective and be best equipped to help you. Further, they’ll be focused on helping you cope with living in a neurotypical world, instead of encouraging you to change to assimilate yourself into said neurotypical world. 

Once you’ve decided which challenges you’re facing and the modality of therapy you’d most like to pursue, it’s time to start looking for therapists in your area. Online search tools like Psychology Today and Good Therapy are good starting points if you’re looking for a therapist with a specific specialty, such as anxiety disorders or CBT. 

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During your search, you may notice that you’re encountering therapists with different types of titles. This is because there are many different routes to becoming a therapist and many different roles under the mental health care umbrella. Some of these roles include:

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• Psychologists: Psychologists hold a doctoral degree in clinical psychology, counseling, or a related field. They can evaluate your mental health, make diagnoses and provide either group or individual therapy. 
• Counselors and therapists: Counselors and therapists hold master's degrees in a mental health-related field, like counseling or psychology. These professionals can evaluate your mental health and offer therapeutic treatments, including group and individual therapy.  
• Clinical Social Workers: Clinical social workers hold master’s degrees and, like counselors, can evaluate your mental health and provide therapy. However, they are also trained in case management and advocacy services. 

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Whether a therapist has a doctorate or a master’s degree, they all completed extensive training in their specialty. Each state has different requirements for counseling professionals to complete, but they all include clinical hours, where they see patients under direct supervision and observe other practitioners. As a part of the direct supervision, they will complete hundreds of hours of in-person therapy sessions with clients, checking in with a supervising clinician often. They also have to pass the national licensing exam. So, no matter the route someone takes to become a therapist, they complete extensive training and are held to high standards.

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Any of the professionals listed above can provide therapy and may specialize in different conditions or therapy modalities. You may find that you have a preference for one set of qualifications over another, and that’s okay. Or, you may also find that the letters beside the name don’t matter, so long as you like the clinician you’re seeing. That’s fine, too. Any licensed mental health professional is capable of providing great care.

Not only is it important to consider the type of care you’d like to receive and which type of professional is the best fit, but it’s also important to consider other factors that may make you feel more comfortable with your therapist. 

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Some people prefer therapists of the same gender, and that’s a reasonable filter to use when searching for a therapist. You should also consider factors such as religious beliefs and cultural background. It’s normal to want to see a therapist who has had similar experiences or who is part of the same cultural or marginalized groups that you are. For example, if you’re part of the LGBTQIA+ community, you may want a therapist who is also part of the community. 

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Regardless, it’s essential that you feel safe and comfortable opening up to your therapist in each session, and that you have a good rapport with them. While having similarities is a good starting point for building rapport, you might not always click with a therapist right away. Feeling a little uncomfortable during your first few sessions is not unusual. However, that discomfort should fade as you get more comfortable opening up to your therapist and building trust. 

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If you find that after a few sessions a therapist just isn’t the right fit, then it’s okay to pursue care from someone else who might be more in line with what you’re looking for.

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Exploring online therapy options can open up a world of possibilities for autistic adults, offering convenience, flexibility and access to specialized care regardless of your location. By considering telemedicine, you may find more therapists who are well-versed in autism-friendly practices and can provide services through video conferencing, secure messaging, or phone sessions. This approach not only minimizes the challenges associated with traveling to in-person appointments but also allows you to experience therapy from the comfort and familiarity of your own environment. 

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When searching for online therapists, it’s essential to ensure that the web platform they use is secure. You’ll also want to make sure the practitioner you’re seeing is fully licensed and able to practice in your state. 

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Though the efficacy of teletherapy is still being studied, early research suggests that online therapy is effective in treating certain conditions like depression and panic disorder, making it a viable option for those who wish to choose it over in-person appointments.

Reading reviews for your potential future therapist is an important part of the process. Someone can present themselves well on their website or during an initial consultation, but still offer a level of care that you may not be satisfied with. To evaluate a therapist’s reviews and reputation, try checking a handful of different sources, such as their website, professional directories like Psychology Today, general review sites, or local forums. From there, try to identify any recurring themes or patterns in the reviews. Do the autistic adults in their care feel understood? Are they understanding about sensory preferences? Are their clients consistently achieving their treatment goals? 

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Reading the first-hand experiences of other clients can help give you a good look at how a therapist operates and may offer insight into whether or not they’re the right fit for you.

For example, after I was diagnosed with autism, I found myself looking for an affirming therapist. Through a Reddit forum for my city, I found a practice that focuses on adult autism. They offered the type of therapy I was most interested in, and the consultation went well. The best part is that their reviews mentioned how sensory-friendly the office is and how accommodating they are of their patients’ unique needs. I was already feeling confident about proceeding, but the reviews made me feel much better about my decision to seek therapy with their practice.

Unfortunately, cost can be a significant barrier for many people who are seeking therapy. Therefore, it’s important to establish care with someone who’s upfront about their pricing policies and who best fits your budget. Some therapists choose to publish their rates on their websites, while others typically reveal their rates during an initial consultation.

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Luckily, many practitioners do accept insurance. This is also something that you can ask about during a consultation or before your first therapy session. Alternatively, you can typically access a search tool through your insurance provider’s website and locate therapists in your area who accept your insurance plan. 

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If a therapist doesn’t take insurance, you can ask if they offer a sliding scale, which is based on your income. Or, you can ask your insurance if they offer any out-of-network benefits. 

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At Prosper Health, we’re proud to work with most major insurance providers, and we’re always looking to expand our network. 

Before your first therapy appointment, you’ll likely have a short phone consultation. This is a great opportunity to decide if a therapist is the right fit for you. Here are some questions you can ask:

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• What degrees or certifications do you hold? What was your training?
• What kind of treatment plan or therapies do you think will help me?
• How long should I expect to wait before I start feeling better?
• Do you take insurance? 
• What is your cost per session?
• How do you assess progress? What will we do if I’m not progressing?
• What is your experience working with people on the autism spectrum?

Finding the right therapist might feel daunting, but it’s a worthwhile task. A good therapist can be the difference between feeling stuck and meeting your mental health goals. This guide can serve as a reference point as you begin your journey to find the right practitioner for your unique needs. 

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At Prosper Health, we offer 100% virtual neurodiversity-affirming therapy, and our clinicians are experts in providing personalized care to autistic adults. We’d love to help you find the right therapist. Get started with us today!