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Biography
Hello! I am Dr. Whaling, but you can call me Kelly. I am a licensed clinical psychologist in the state of Utah and will soon be licensed in additional states. Additionally, I hold a valid PsyPact license which allows me to provide services to clients in 40+ states. I received my doctorate in psychology from the University of California, Santa Barbara and completed a post-doctoral fellowship specializing in providing trauma-informed and neurodiversity-affirming psychological evaluations. Through my work in inpatient, outpatient, residential, and juvenile justice facilities, I have found a deep passion for working with autistic folks! I am excited to meet you and hear your story.
Education
PhD in Counseling, Clinical, and School Psychology from University of California, Santa Barbara; Masters in Clinical Psychology from California State University, Northridge
Certifications
Area of Expertise
Since 2013, I have been a clinician working with marginalized groups experiencing the aftermath of trauma, namely suicidality and self-harm. Because of the high rates of adversity that autistic people experience, this naturally led to me working with many autistic folks. Through this work, I realized my favorite experiences were bonding with those on the autism spectrum and supporting them in their self-advocacy journey.
My goal as a psychologist is to help people build a rich, meaningful, and beautiful life that is in line with their values. Authenticity and vulnerability are critical to this goal, and I believe that these traits are contagious. Aiding you in your own strengths-based self-discovery, my hope is that you are able to affirm and celebrate your unique self and empower others around you to do the same.
Modalities
Affiliations
Research and Publications
Is Autism Genetic? What Science Actually Shows
Autism diagnoses have increased by about 300% over the past 20 years, along with a rise in more widespread understanding about this neurological condition. While the phrase “knowledge is power” comes to mind, the more we understand autism, the more questions about its origins and causes inevitably arise.
When I received my daughter’s autism diagnosis, part of me was relieved. My suspicions had been confirmed, and we could now obtain much-needed accommodations. At the same time, countless questions were spilling out of my brain as quickly as I could form them.
- “Did I do something unhealthy in my pregnancy?” (Answer: No)
- “Is there a connection between my neurodivergent brother and my husband’s autistic nephew? (Answer: Probably)
- “How did our genetics play a role in my daughter’s diagnosis?” (Answer: It’s complicated; more importantly, no one is to blame, and no one gene is responsible)
- “Is there an autism cure?” (Answer: No, because autism is not a disease and doesn’t need to be “fixed”)
The truth is, there remains a lot of confusion around the causes of autism—specifically on the subject of genetics—even though we know so much more about this condition now than we did only a decade or two ago.
Still, everyone deserves to understand why they are the way they are, without fear, guilt, or shame. Our goal with this article is to help you understand the relationship between autism and genetics, as well as to clarify common misconceptions about genetic inheritance, the process by which DNA is passed down from parents to children.
But above all, we’re here to remind you that humans, whether neurotypical or neurodivergent, are so much more than their genetic makeup.
Unmasking: What It Means for Autistic Adults and How to Do It Safely
For autistic people, masking—presenting yourself in a way, either consciously or unconsciously, to fit in better in a neurotypical world—can be both necessary and exhausting. That’s where the concept of “unmasking” comes in.
Unmasking is the process of making space for your autistic or neurodivergent traits to shine through in your day-to-day life. It's about working toward honoring your unique brain and what it needs, slowly letting go of the pressure to appear neurotypical.
“Unmasking, in the simplest terms, is about letting your nervous system participate in your life instead of fighting it all day,” says Stephanie Steele-Wren, PsyD, a licensed psychologist specializing in adult autism. “It isn’t about turning into a different person or suddenly being ‘your real self.’ Unmasking is the gradual decision to stop overriding your nervous system to appear ‘acceptable.’”
But it’s important to note that autistic masking exists for a reason, and unmasking is not mandatory. Like most things related to autism, it’s not black and white. That’s why we’re here to break down what you need to know about unmasking, why it can be beneficial (when done safely), what it looks like in practice, and what supports can help.
Why Many Adults Receive a Late Autism Diagnosis, And What to Do Next
Getting diagnosed with autism later in life, whether it’s in your 20s or 40s or even your 60s, can be a total game-changer. It can impact your entire sense of identity and how you interact with the world and others. It can also bring a profound feeling of relief while answering many questions, including: why did it take so long to figure this out?
For Tobey, 41, the turning point following his clinical diagnosis was a deep sense of self-acceptance. “Once I stopped burning energy on hiding and masking, I was able to redirect that effort into becoming my true self,” he says. “The difference has been huge.”
Tobey is far from the only adult who spent decades living with undiagnosed autism. In fact, the rate of autism in adults has been steadily increasing. Between 2011 and 2022, the autism diagnosis rate increased by 450% among 26-to 34-year-olds alone.
Today, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) estimates that one in 45 adults is autistic, and even more are likely undiagnosed. This rise is due to the improved understanding of the condition (and acknowledgement that autism is a true spectrum, rather than a collection of specific traits) thus leading to updated diagnostic criteria.
Whether you’re newly diagnosed yourself or are considering getting an adult autism evaluation, you probably have a lot of questions. In this article, we’ll provide a neurodivergent-affirming breakdown of why many adults receive a late autism diagnosis, and we’ll unpack both the challenges and benefits, as well as how to access support.
